shiki no kagi 3

8th January 2004, Thursday
Dear Diary,
I was watering the plants today with Junko-chan from the orphanage (by the way, I just love those kids there! Junko-chan sticks especially close to me~) when I saw Akiko walk out slowly from one of the bedrooms, carrying a kitten stuffed toy, moving towards Junko. But when she saw me, she turned back abruptly, disappearing from sight again.

I don't want any more moments like this. I don't understand this hide-and-seek game. From just now, it was obvious she remembers me! But... is she avoiding me because she was afraid to relive the past? Was I just part of her past? Did she want to forget me?

Then some time after that incident, we were all having dinner, and she had a seat opposite me. She kept on staring at her plate, occasionally dropping her chopsticks and saying a quiet 'sorry'. Yet it didn't seem like she was apologising for being rude. It seemed more like she was apologising to someone in particular in the room. I wonder if that person was me. But if it were me, she wouldn't avoid me. I mean, she would know I'd just embrace her on the spot if she'd acknowledge me.

But she didn't. She didn't run to me.

It's pretty late now. I better get some sleep; I have early classes tomorrow. Oyasumi.

Oyasumi, Akiko.

9th January 2004, Friday
Dear Diary,
I caught her staring in space at a pile of books near the sliding doors of the orphanage. I crept quietly behind her. She was staring at a book on parenting. I was some distance from her so she didn't notice my presence. She reached out for the book.

Books. From young, we had always read to each other, and shared our voluminous books. We even competed to see who had read the most interesting books. I leaned sideways on the wall next to me, watching her, a small smile forming on my lips when I thought of the memory.

But something happened that shocked me later. She was a great lover of books. More than any other person I had ever known. But...

She took up the book on parenting, and ripped it apart. I could only see papers flying in the air around her, and she just continued tearing, before flinging the jacket of the book across the floor. She moved no more after that.

I was curious as to what really happened to her family. Why would she tear that book up? But in any case I can't question her on that now, because she seems to have not opened up to me yet, and she hasn't recovered from the hurt.

Yabai! I forgot to do my assignment before I write this! But I couldn't help it. :P

10th January 2004, Saturday
Dear Diary,
Akiko and I were in charge of hanging up the clothes today in the backyard. We didn't speak at first. So I decided to advance a bit. I commented on the weather because I didn't know which angle I should strike at. "It's hot today, ne?" She didn't nod to that; she didn't respond at all. I didn't want to give up. I tried again. At the same time I noticed that there was a scar along her arm. "The weather reminds me of the last natsu matsuri we went to together. Do you still remember it?" When she still didn't respond, I finally asked, "Why is there a scar on your arm?"

This time, she stopped placing pegs over the clothes. She stared at the huge bed sheet in front of her. "Accident."

She said something to me!! We finally have a start! At this I really feel encouraged. I want this to happen everyday. I want us to progress further, and then we can finally be like what we used to be...

Of course, I know that sounds like some childish thinking, because we will never return to that age of innocence, but I want her to open up to me, to trust me.

11th January 2004, Sunday
Dear Diary,
Only this afternoon I realised I have three assignments I forgot to do!! Well I've finished two, and now I'm too exhausted, so I decided I needed a break, and here I am, writing. I actually wanted to bring Akira-kun out because he said he missed looking at flower shops and candy shops along the streets. His parents used to hold his hands and stroll with him past rows of shops, but he does not have the luxury to do that now. But when I found out that I had so many assignments, I was so disappointed! I wasn't disappointed at the heaviness of the assignments, but at the fact that I couldn't bring Akira-kun out! One of these days I am going to.

I better go back to doing my assignment.

12th January 2004, Monday
Dear Diary,
Akiko said another word to me today!! URESHII! She said...

"...Hai."

I know, I know, I'm gloating over it, even though it wasn't much. Do I sound like someone who just heard his own child say her first word? Do I?? DO I??? Ahhh I don't care. She spoke to me again! I am happy enough. I know we'll progress further.

I managed to hand in all my assignments on time! Keii-chan deserves a reward~ I brought Akira-kun out today! That's my reward! He kept on staring at the rows of shops, and I got him a pack of assorted candy. He shared them with the rest of the children after that. He even went up to Akiko slowly and handed her a sweet! Akiko didn't refuse this time. She nodded and took it. But you could tell she was still having a guard about her...

13th January 2004, Tuesday
Dear Diary,
I am at home right now. Why is that so? Because otou-san says this evening there'll be some people coming to stay at our house. He says it's for business matters, and he wants me to be at home. But by the way he explained things, it felt more like he NEEDS me to be at home. I felt kind of sad to leave the orphanage. I told Akiko I'd visit again, and to my surprise, she looked me in the eye and nodded to that! I think she misses the old days when we were such great friends, but at the same time missing those times is bringing her pain.

Phone call.

14th January 2004, Wednesday
Dear Diary,
It's 1am in the morning now. I can't get to sleep. Just through a span of hours a lot of emotions have been passing through me. The family who are here, yes they are here on business, but the point of staying over is so that... I could get to know the other family's daughter, Nishimoto Mika. You know what that means, right? It means they expect the outcome to be me marrying Nishimoto-san.

Iyadda. I don't want that. I know Nishimoto-san is a nice girl and all, but ... no matter how long we will be facing each other, I don't think we'll go beyond friends. And since they said that the Nishimoto family was here on business, is that marriage like a merger? IYADDA! ZETTAI IYADDA! I don't want to marry because of business! I know that in this world, maybe there are a lot of circumstances when one has to be practical, when we have to plunge back into the cruel world, but in this I don't want to. I want to be together with someone I love, to walk with her through that cruel world!

Really... I don't if all this is because I see Akiko as my definite future wife. I don't know. At this point, I am wondering if I see her as my wife, or my precious little sister. Or even a friend. Which one of these is it? Can somebody enlighten me?! Now in this fix, I even have to have an internal struggle!

I actually told okaa-san about Akiko after that, and also how I know they are trying to pair Mika and me up. Okaa-san frowned when she heard that. She explained how she and otou-san had considered Nishimoto-san after considering what kinds of girls I could probably like. (My jaw really dropped literally at that time.) Yes, I do LIKE Nishimoto-san, but I don’t LOVE her. And the other factor was about business. They said it was cruel, but they felt Nishimoto-san was somebody who would walk with me through harsh times. I know. I know she's probably great and everything but I don't have that feeling towards her.

When I mentioned Akiko later, because I really couldn't help it anymore, I told her how I was confused as to whether I really saw Akiko as my wife. Okaa-san was shocked at first to learn that I've found Akiko some time ago, and she kept really silent. But later on, she said,

"...Isn't Akiko just a childhood friend to you?"

shiki no kagi 2

chapter 2

5th January 2005, Monday
Dear Diary,
tsukare~ I had so many additional lectures today that I really DRAGGED my feet all the way home! I did more thinking than usual, because I'm still anxious to go to the orphanage tomorrow. I cancelled my trip for Karaoke with my schoolmates, because of this. Then I got a lot of teasing from them, like, "Ah, you're abandoning us for your girlfriend!" "Who is it??" Of course I can't tell them anything yet. They are really my good buddies, but when it comes to this, it's my little secret. It's good to have secrets sometimes.

I recently got a penpal. Wow, imagine this, Koyama Keiichiro having a penpal! Hmm but I feel so much more open with my penpal. His name is Shigeaki, but I just call him Shige-chan for short. haha. Isn't it funny? How I seem to want to tell this penpal whom I've never seen in person before everything, but not the schoolmates whom I see everyday?

I wonder what goes on in the other house. Akiko's previous house, I mean. It is just a little way down the street, and if I look out the window from the attic I can see it.

My little cousin is preparing to go home already! I'll surely miss her chubby little cheeks are our identical eyes! I'm sure she'll miss climbing the stairs in our house, and of course, my nice hair. I should go off to give her another hug before she goes off.

6th January 2005, Tuesday
Dear Diary,
Umeda-sensei was telling us about his own experiences in tutorial today, and he said, "It's hard to break down hard, cold ice unless it is done wit the HEAT of passion." That is the experience he had with a student who was very cold and defensive, always on his guard.

Who knew that was the signal of the day?

I rushed over to the orphanage after lessons (and side note, I think one of my lecture notes from Chinese Literature flew away when I was rushing there!! I better borrow them from my schoolmate.) Yup, so by the time I got there, the little kids were having their early dinner.

The Head of the orphanage, Enomoto-san, was there today, fortunately. She was the one who told me all about this Akiko in the orphanage. We were walking in the backyard, and...

"She was Tanaka Akiko. Her mother passed away sometime after their family separation. I heard she used to be such an optimistic, cheerful girl, who never once broke her promises. But after she came in, she changed totally. She just puts up a guard around her, and totally ignores us. It has been like this for years, and no matter how much we help her, she won't react. And in all this, inevitably, she's hurt quite a few people's feelings."

Akiko. That was her in the orphanage! I had really wanted to see her then. But as that thought came into my mind, someone had burst into the backyard saying that Akiko had run away. Why? Where was she now? And because I was too anxious, I immediately volunteered to search for her, without waiting for a reply from Enomoto-san.

It didn't take me very long to find her -- wait, or is it because I didn't take note of the time? Anyway, I found her beneath a sakura tree. The tree had no blossoms on it yet, because the sakura season hasn't arrived yet. She was gazing at the tree very quietly.

"I heard she used to be such an optimistic, cheerful girl, who never once broke her promises."

Does that still stand true now? Because what happened next hurt me a lot. I had run to her, and she had stared at me. I swear her face really paled horribly. Plus all that cold in this time of the year... "Akiko?" I called.

But she didn't respond warmly. She refused me. She refused to acknowledge me! She brushed the whole relationship off with a, "I don't know who you are."

"Don't you remember me? I'm Keii-chan! We used to be the best of friends. Don't you remember our promise?" But no, she didn't remember. I felt like somebody just poured a whole barrel of ice water over me.

She simply stared at me like she had never seen me before. No matter how much I talked, it didn't seem to get into her. And while I'm writing this, I still feel that ache when this took place. I really don't know what to do with her.

Seeing her in this situation made me really want to protect her and let her trust me, but I panic so much now, I have no idea what I should do! If only an answer could just drop from the sky! So many years have passed and she's just changed so much, I've got too much running through my mind. I was just standing there, rambling off our relationship, but nothing could make the old Akiko come back. All she did was silently brush past me and walked back to the orphanage...

Tell me what I should do... The silence in the house at midnight now is scaring me. I wonder if I shall be able to wake up early enough for school tomorrow. I can't get back to sleep. It feels so cold.

I still see that sakura tree outside there. If by some chance it is really going to be our symbol, I pray for it to help us. I want to bring Akiko back.

7th January 2005, Wednesday
Dear Diary,
...I am in the orphanage now. I actually requested to stay there for a few days. Of course, I mustn't trouble Enomoto-san right? I am going to help out there everyday and also pay for my own meals. It's not like I should eat the orphanage's money, because they need it to support the children! I want to observe Akiko, I want to know what I should do to help her, until the day I hear her call me Budou-chan again. I want us to be in purple and orange again.

I have to take a longer distance to school, too, but I don't mind. Koyama has to learn to be determined and train himself!! I just received Shige-chan's reply, isn't that fast? He says he heard his family used to have a girl named Akiko too. Wow. Is this name that common... But nevertheless I found Tanaka Akiko. And I am glad I found her, even though we are at this difficult point now.

Orenji-chan, matteru yo.

shiki no kagi chapter 1

2nd January 2004, Friday
Dear Diary,
Big yawn!!! I am so tired~ I am going to help out at the orphanage that otou-san helps fund this Sunday. I am born into a wealthy family, so I feel that I must do my best to help those who are less fortunate! I will not let myself be fortunate for nothing! Ganbarimasu~ O(>.<)o

Actually there's another reason why I want to help the orphans. They remind me of Akiko. She must be somewhere alone out there now. I wonder how many times I have to mention her at the start of the year na~!

My cousin is coming over to stay tomorrow. Can you believe this? She is only four years old! I am already 20. Haha. I haven't seen her before, because her parents migrated to Canada when she was very young. I'm sure she must be cute. ♥

Okaa-san just called from downstairs asking if I wanted grapes. Grapes... Even grapes remind me of Aki-chan.

"...Orenji-chan!" Koyama exclaimed.

"...eh?! Orenji-chan? Budou-chan!!" Akiko shouted in answer.

"Why 'budou-chan'?"

"Why 'orenji-chan' then?"

"Because you're wearing orange." Koyama pointed out.

Akiko smiled. "And you're wearing purple, Budou-chan."

Yup! And that's because Akiko called me 'grapes'. Heehee, maybe I should be a novelist! No, no, I have to take over the family's ramen company. Otou-san expects it na~ I don't mind it, but... I wish I could do something else I'd really find meaningful. But if it's my responsibility, I'll do it. Otou-san always talked of responsibility. The only thing I am puzzled over is why otou-san allowed me to take Chinese Literature instead of Business in university. Ought I not to grasp some academic knowledge of business so I can run the company? I guess otou-san is leaving it up to me.

Aki-chan's family owned a textile company. That's why I remember her being in a fair few pretty kimonos every year at different festivals. It was tremendously fun back then. And she even got a really really comfortable yukata for me! It's still in my closet right now, even if I am too tall to fit into it.

...and I only just realised, everytime I am with her, coincidentally I would have a shade of purple on me, and she, orange. But those were not our favourite colours. That was just a coincidence.

I always wonder what I might say to her if I see her again now. Would I even get the chance to do so?

Okaa-san is calling me downstairs. She says there are suddenly bugs at the kitchen window and she can't find the pesticide. Something like that. Maybe I was pondering too much and didn't hear clearly. But hold on a minute, BUGS?!! Yabai! I wonder... if it was because of me eating at the kitchen window and having dropped stuff unknowingly...

In any case I shall tread safely and hunt for the pesticide.

3rd January 2005, Saturday
Dear Diary,
my cousin came over to stay today, and she has got a really cute name. MOMO! Haha... She is still here today. Did you know? She, surprisingly, has small eyes like me. But she has a funny hobby of loving to climb up and down the stairs of the house. I wonder why? It was some time before I actually could lure her away from the staircase. And the next thing she couldn't stop doing was touching my hair! Well I have a habit of touching my hair too. Is it that nice to touch? Just joking.

4th January 2005, Sunday
Dear Diary,
I went to the orphanage today. And I made an interesting discovery. I'm exited to confirm my doubts, but I didn't have the chance to do so today. The Head of the orphanage had been away today! And tomorrow I have additional lectures and I can't make a trip there.

I had been helping to move cardboard boxes with the children at the orphanage, and I overheard them talking. I didn't mean to eavesdrop! Well it wasn't actually considered eavesdropping, since I actually was beside them and they didn't make an effort to hush themselves.

"...Don't bother about her. You're always getting upset over Akiko nee-chan." the first little boy called Akira had said to the other boy beside him, Kentaro. Of course, the first thing that had struck me was the name Akiko. It perhaps was not possible but there was that faint hope.

"Demo... I don't believe Aki nee-chan is so harsh." Kentaro answered in disappointment.

"Ano!" I had interrupted. They had both looked at me. "Who is this Akiko? Do you know her previous surname?" They shook their heads at me, and I had been thoroughly disappointed then.

Akira offered more information for me, though. "Akiko nee-chan is very anti-social. She just keeps to herself most of the time. The scary thing is, she just won't make any noise, and when she does, something bad has to happen after. Yesterday, she-"

"Akira-kun, don't say anymore!" Kentaro had cut in suddenly, a huge frown on his face.

A quietly rebellious girl? That wasn't the Akiko I knew back then. Back then, she was so cheerful, so full of enthusiasm in our conversations, and always such a gentle, sweet girl. Nevertheless, who knew what so many years might have done? I am determined to find out if she is Akiko. If she's not... Well it was a good hope. Half of me wants it to be her, because I want to find her. The other half doesn't want it to be her, because it pains me to hear that she has turned into such a depressing corner.

Either way, one day I'll find her.

Because we promised each other.

Bokura no Matsuri [1]

Inspired by Pi's new hair. >.<
probably going to be a pretty short fic. I had to call him Tomohisa in the fic because in the fic, Yamapi is not an idol! ^^;
The first chapter is pretty short, because it's only introducing the two main characters. (:
Song: Endless Story - Ito Yuna

CHAPTER ONE

"Atsui!" Hiroko complained, fanning herself with her uchiwa.

"Ojou-sama, please slow down!" Maaya-san called out exasperatedly, trying to catch up with Hiroko. Maaya-san was the assistant of Nakamura Hiroki, the daughter of a wealthy family. Though beautiful, Hiroko was extremely wilful, rather spoilt to the core and rather proud -- not of her looks, but of her "status". No male dared to ask her out -- and one even wonders if she had any suitors -- for they could not catch up with her in many areas.

"Hurry up, Maaya-san! I want to go to the water yo-yo stall!" That Natsu Matsuri, 19-year-old Hiroko had a beautiful orange yukata on, graced with golden phoenixes towards the base. It was easy to tell that she was from a wealthy family from her dressing and hair ornaments.

Hiroko crouched down by the tub of rainbow-coloured water balloons, oblivious to the people around her. Just as she spotted the last orange water balloon and was about to hook it up, a hand covered by a black yukata sleeve shot out, and when it was gone, so was the orange water balloon.

Hiroko's head shot up to see a male in a dark yukata, a smirk of triumph upon his face. He had various accessories round his wrists, and his hair had a portion shaved off, such that he looked like a gangster.

"Hey, that's mine!" Hiroko demanded, standing up.

He stood up too. "Excuse me? I hooked it up. Your name isn't on it anyway. Stop being such a petty person and hook up another one."

"What right have you as a poor gangster got to insult me?!" Hiroko asked. People around her were staring at her, parents shaking their heads at her pampered behaviour, and others secretly wishing they could rip the arrogant look on her face.

"Ano, I'm really sorry about this! My ojou-sama is not in a very good mood and-"

"Maaya-san! You don't have to apologise to this person!" Hiroko interrupted. "I'm not going to forget you." she then hissed to him, walking away.

"That was rude of her na~ Ne, Tomo-chan?" Masuda Takahisa, a friend of his, commented. His hands were full of teriyaki, takoyaki and onigiri, due to the fact that he was a great lover of eating. That day, he had donned a dark purple yukata.

"She can't do anything to me. She's just another rich spoilt brat who doesn't know that wealth comes with responsibility. She can't win Yamashita Tomohisa in any case." Tomohisa folded his arms, looking after the still prominent figure of the orange yukata.

Hiroko stormed through the crowd, not waiting for Maaya-san again. She watched as little groups of close friends walked together, laughing at the sights and telling their own jokes. She was alone. She had let him insult her. She had promised herself not to let anyone do that. Most of all, Hiroko did not know what kind of person she was like. She could only bother to spend on herself lavishly whenever she was upset, always escaping from the question of who she wanted to be and what she wanted to do. And she did not know nor appear to care what others think of her, because she was always alone. But deep down inside she wondered. And wondered.

Not long after, Hiroko arrived at the goldfish-scooping store. Maaya-san finally caught up, panting. Hiroko bent down, watching the goldfish swim around, avoiding the touch of the fragile paper scoops, trying to find their freedom. Yet wherever they went, there was no such thing as liberty. She put a finger in.

"Miss, I'm sorry, but you have to scoop the goldfish with the paper scoop." The stall attendant gently reminded, smiling at her warmly. Hiroko only stared back at him, not replying nor did her hand emerge to take the scoop from him. Her stare was only broken when another hand shot out to take the scoop from the stall attendant. It was him again. Hiroko silently watched him carefully scoop up two goldfishes, and as the stall attendant placed the two goldfishes in a bag, congratulating him, HE had smiled gently at Hiroko, handing the bag to her.

Yet Hiroko chose to surface her cold and hard shell, glaring at him before she turned away sharply, throwing away that almost likeable face of her. Tomohisa frowned, looking after Hiroko. When he had seen Hiroko looking gently and intently at the fishes, he had thought perhaps she had just been childish just now, but now he felt he could confirm she was pretty anti-social. And too proud for her own good.

They did not exactly have a very good first impression of each other.

Still feeling annoyed of having seen him for a second time at the matsuri, Hiroko wandered off, until Maaya-san had completely lost sight of her. She chanced upon a candy stall. Memories came back in that instant.

"Otou-san, that stallholder is blind." Hiroko said, hiding behind her father as though in digust at the candy stall's attendant. She had been a very protected child, and until otou-san got to come home did she start to get out of the house and see what was the outside like.

Otou-san squatted down in front of little Hiroko, holding her arms as she donned a plain red yukata. "Hiro-chan, not everyone is born blessed like you."

"Demo... Demo I don't like him." Hiroko answered back.

"You should open your eyes wide and love everyone."

...but that was not what 'otou-san' told her.